They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize