i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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