somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Randomize
