the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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