I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
even my farts smell like vagina
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I think a kid would responsible me up
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
