gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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