jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Randomize
