I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Bring me that man meat
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize
