Absence makes the cock grow harder.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Randomize
