OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
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