thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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