We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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