oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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