Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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