I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Randomize
