You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
oh god the rape fog is back!
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I'm sobbing to NWA
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
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