I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Randomize
