I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
