whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize
