We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
