I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Randomize