im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
