Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
how drunk are you?
Several
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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