I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Randomize
