We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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