Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
