He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
if i died would you start the facebook group?
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
