Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
