Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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