He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
That reminds me...we need to get swords
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He's a Shit stain on my heart
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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