Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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