wat bout pragnant strippers??
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
