Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
BRING THE BAGELS
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
