How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
