It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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