he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize