and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
