My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
