Do you still have your period?
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
