To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Is it penis luge time yet?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
