I can tuck mytits in my pants
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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