You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
