I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
