woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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