thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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