I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
