I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Randomize
