So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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