I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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