So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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