At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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