Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
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