Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
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